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Legendary aging New Age improvisational superstar pianist George Winston, peeved at the soporific effect his music was having on the audience, took a sledgehammer to his piano, asked, "Happy now?" and got a standing ovation.

12/27/2011

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I once knew a girl who always wore a silver dress. She was petite--a little thin, but cute. She had big wide eyes and a puckered mouth, which gave her a permanently baffled look. Her name was Anne. Anne Chovy.

12/27/2011

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On You Tube you can see and hear Frank Sinatra's version of the George Harrison-penned Beatles classic "Something," in which he says, "You stick around, Jack, it may show." (No joke.)

12/26/2011

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A Chinese friend of mine who was locked up in solitary confinement for asking someone a question on a bus figured out how to pass the time in prison, by reciting the Chinese alphabet song to himself.

12/26/2011

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I've lived in this city for over five and a half years now, and I know it as well as the Chinese alphabet, which is to say, not at all.

12/26/2011

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How much would someone have to pay you in order for you to agree to have a corporate logo emblazoned on every object you owned and tattooed on the faces of everybody you knew and met (don't worry--only you'd be getting paid)?

12/26/2011

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It's a good thing for the repressive corporate and governmental structures being built all around us that so many of us are such unabashed exhibitionists. I wonder if our spies ever get annoyed by so many flagrant displays of political irrelevance.

12/26/2011

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One day an eagle ate some psylosibin mushrooms and tried to carry off a tree to his nest. A bunch of other birds stood and regarded him with muffled laughter, trying to think of sad things to stop themselves from laughing.

12/26/2011

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I'll bet if you were a tree you would get sick to your stomach every time you heard the snarling roar of a chainsaw. How and what would you puke? Big puddles of pulp, no doubt from a squirrel's garage door.

12/26/2011

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I looked up the etymology of "web log." It turns out to be what a rare African spider the size of a gorilla uses to build her home.

12/26/2011

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Legendary aging New Age improvisational superstar pianist George Winston, peeved at the soporific effect his music was having on the audience, took a sledgehammer to his piano, asked, "Happy now?" and got a standing ovation.

I once knew a girl who always wore a silver dress. She was petite--a little thin, but cute. She had big wide eyes and a puckered mouth, which gave her a permanently baffled look. Her name was Anne. Anne Chovy.

On You Tube you can see and hear Frank Sinatra's version of the George Harrison-penned Beatles classic "Something," in which he says, "You stick around, Jack, it may show." (No joke.)

A Chinese friend of mine who was locked up in solitary confinement for asking someone a question on a bus figured out how to pass the time in prison, by reciting the Chinese alphabet song to himself.

I've lived in this city for over five and a half years now, and I know it as well as the Chinese alphabet, which is to say, not at all.

How much would someone have to pay you in order for you to agree to have a corporate logo emblazoned on every object you owned and tattooed on the faces of everybody you knew and met (don't worry--only you'd be getting paid)?

It's a good thing for the repressive corporate and governmental structures being built all around us that so many of us are such unabashed exhibitionists. I wonder if our spies ever get annoyed by so many flagrant displays of political irrelevance.

One day an eagle ate some psylosibin mushrooms and tried to carry off a tree to his nest. A bunch of other birds stood and regarded him with muffled laughter, trying to think of sad things to stop themselves from laughing.

I'll bet if you were a tree you would get sick to your stomach every time you heard the snarling roar of a chainsaw. How and what would you puke? Big puddles of pulp, no doubt from a squirrel's garage door.

I looked up the etymology of "web log." It turns out to be what a rare African spider the size of a gorilla uses to build her home.

I teach English in South Korea, the greatest country in the world, just south of the worst country in the world.

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